Las Vegas Bowl has 3 yards, cloud of dust, few thrills

After watching Wisconsin slog to a 20-13 triumph implicit Arizona State successful the archetypal Las Vegas Bowl played astatine Allegiant Stadium Thursday night, it should person been evident that for a vessel crippled to beryllium successful, astatine slightest 1 of the pursuing indispensable beryllium present:

Tons of fans.

Lots of touchdowns.

Snow.

A Poulan Weed Eater.

A 5-gallon sideline cooler filled with mayonnaise to dump connected the winning coach.

The Las Vegas Bowl, said to beryllium caller and improved, had nary of these.

Instead of a ton of fans, it had 32,515 — the second-smallest Las Vegas Bowl turnout successful the past 16. The Raiders’ palatial digs were little than half-filled erstwhile it was thought the crippled mightiness merchantability out, astatine slightest earlier COVID-19 returned similar an univited location guest.

Instead of tons of touchdowns, it had 4 tract goals.

Instead of snow, it had clime control.

Instead of a Poulan Weed Eater, it had a rubric sponsor that distributes gathering materials.

The Wisconsin players didn’t dump roofing tiles oregon asbestos shingles connected Paul Chryst. Unless I missed it, they didn’t adjacent douse their manager successful Gatorade.

Show goes on

None of this was the responsibility of the Las Vegas Bowl, which was tasked with making lemonade retired of a big, abdominous lemon. As 1 of its officials truthful eloquently stated successful the property box, “at slightest we had a game.”

Had the vessel committee (or ESPN) selected UCLA alternatively of Arizona State, they would person had an bare stadium alternatively of 1 little than half-filled, based connected the destiny of the Holiday Bowl successful San Diego. Four hours earlier kickoff connected Tuesday, the Bruins claimed they were truthful sick and bushed they couldn’t enactment a squad connected the tract against North Carolina State.

Here’s the irony: Until Arizona State someway scored a second-half touchdown, the Holiday Bowl mightiness person been much compelling contempt being canceled.

The closeness of the last people notwithstanding, Wisconsin’s aboriginal pb ne'er seemed successful jeopardy successful a crippled truthful filled with malaise (but not mayonnaise) that with 10 minutes to play, I had pencilled successful Logan Taylor, the Sun Devils’ backup punter, arsenic my No. 3 star.

After Eddie Czaplicki was injured upon being tally into, Taylor pinned the Badgers astatine their ain 3-yard enactment with a 44-yard punt that checked up similar 1 of Phil Mickelson’s attack shots.

Arizona State’s discourtesy consisted mostly of scrambles and underthrown passes by backmost Jayden Daniels that were caught. But determination was murmuring successful the property container that if the Sun Devils could get the shot back, they mightiness triumph contempt having amassed — if that’s the close connection — lone 219 yards.

That’s the full with which they finished. ASU ne'er got the shot back. Wisconsin hemmed and hawed and spit and whittled, covering 90 yards successful 18 plays to tally retired the timepiece without scoring.

It was a marque of aged schoolhouse Big Ten shot that would person made Woody Hayes salivate.

Three yards and a unreality of rubber pellets from the tract turf.

She said ‘yes’

Remember erstwhile John McKay was asked astir the execution of his Tampa Bay Buccaneers backmost erstwhile they wore the creamsicle uniforms, and McKay said helium was each for it?

There were nary specified witty remarks from the coaches during their postgame remarks. There were nary apologies erstwhile 2 whitethorn person been warranted.

ASU manager Herm Edwards said the Sun Devils were truthful extent shy aft opt-outs that 2 violative players played successful the antiaircraft line.

Wisconsin’s Chryst said helium was arrogant of his radical that managed but 294 yards. It was a bully night, it took a batch of guys to nutrient the victory, helium said. The Badgers seemingly were headed backmost to the Wisconsin Dells alternatively of Disneyland.

The night’s champion punctuation really was spoken earlier halftime. A feline connected the Arizona State broadside asked a miss sitting alongside if she would wed him.

She said “Yes.”

If the matrimony lasts, the 2 mightiness beryllium the lone paying customers who volition look backmost connected the archetypal variation of the caller and improved Las Vegas Bowl and telephone it memorable.

Contact Ron Kantowski astatine rkantowski@reviewjournal.com oregon 702-383-0352. Follow @ronkantowski connected Twitter.